If I Stay

Hi, Alondra.

First of all, thank you. I’m so honored to have blown your mind. Second of all, about characters… Mia just came to me. I woke up one morning and there she was: 17 years old, dark hair, serious eyes, and a cellist. Which was news to me because I don’t play the cello.  But she felt so solid and real, I had to start writing. Adam was based a bit on my husband, back in the early punk-rock days of our love story, but as I wrote the book, he took on a life of his own. It’s what happens to characters. They become real to you and you listen to them and they often tell you where the story should go.

Okay, thirdly, I’m not sure if you were being flattering by saying If I Stay is the only book you’ve read but in case it’s true, DON’T STOP THERE. THERE ARE SO MANY AMAZING YA BOOKS OUT THERE.  Head over to the FAQ on my website http://gayleforman.com/bio/ and under the favorite author question, I list a bunch of recent favorite YA books. These are just the tip of the iceberg. Happy reading!

- Gayle Forman

All of the music scenes. No matter how well you write them, it’s different seeing and hearing the music. I got to see several of Adam’s concert scenes shot and they were fantastic (the music itself is so good!) and I have seen the film and they are electric on screen. But just as moving are Mia’s cello performances. Her Juilliard audition makes me cry. Every time.

- Gayle Forman

Surreal. Humbling. Emotional. The first part of the shoot was at the Hall House. The location scouts had found this super cute, if small, home, and I went to visit the day before we started filming. Before the production started, I’d exchanged some emails and photos with R.J. about how the house might be decorated. But when I walked in, my mind was just blown. The Hall House is fictional but it’s based on some real places from my past, and I felt like I was walking into a world that doesn’t exist anymore. The details were so perfect. Things I never told them. They just got it. I looked around. Went outside. Started to cry. I’d like to say it was the only time I lost it on set, but then again, I’d also like to say I’m a natural redhead. Some things just aren’t true.

- Gayle Forman

Hi Ben.

I think the interesting thing about this story, with its two timelines (you see Mia in the present day, and you see her in all kinds of flashbacks), is that you get a double dose of Mia’s transformation. When Mia came to me, she was 17, but already oddly mature (more mature than thirty-something me). I think seeing her as a child, in the context of her cool-but-different family, then seeing her as a musician, and finally seeing her fall in love with Adam, allows the reader to understand how she became this poised young woman who is then put through such a wringer in the present tense story. That Mia is strong. So much stronger than she knows. Really, that Mia’s transformation is about recognizing this strength, and tapping into the reservoir love that feeds it in order to decide her fate. 

As for what I hope teenagers will take away, I’m never sure how to answer that. I don’t write morals or takeaways into my books. (If I did, they would be dreadful!). If I Stay is to me, a series of love stories: Familial love, friendship love, music love, romantic love. I just want readers to blanket themselves in that world, in that love. What they do when they finish is up to them, but if they go give someone a hug, I would not be at all displeased. :)

- Gayle Forman

I didn’t. When the character of Mia arrived, she was a cellist. At the time, it felt like a massive homework assignment. But as I started listening to more and more cello pieces, I was so moved by the instrument. I found myself listening, with tears streaming down my face. In some cases, I’d already written about how Mia felt about the cello (it felt human to her, like it would tell secrets) even before I started listening. So I suspect that I was a closet cello lover; I just didn’t know it yet. In the book, Mia says that the cello was a choice that made her. I think the same is true of me.

- Gayle Forman

There were several moments when I started to suspect that the If I Stay movie was going to reflect the book I’d written. There was the script, of course. And there was when I met the director, R.J. Cutler (and he made me cry but that’s another story). But what really sealed it was the casting. Chloe was attached all along. Of course, I knew she was an incredible actress, but the first time she tweeted a photo of herself practicing the cello, I felt like I was looking at my Mia. With other actors, I was consulted, and every time I was sent news or a screen test to watch, I was blown away. Liana Liberato made me cry as Kim. Mireille Enos as Kat. Joshua Leonard as Denny. Yes and yes. And then, Adam. I don’t know where they pulled Jamie Blackley from, but I still suspect they surgically detached him from my brain. He is Adam. With an English accent (in real life, anyhow, not in the movie). 

- Gayle Forman